I’m really mad! I’m trying so hard to remain Christian in my rant here, but IT IS SO HARD!!! I’m listening in the background as some MORON is on youtube that Izzy is listening to who is DEFENDING Hamas and laughing, LAUGHING about Jews being raped and saying it never happened! And the biggest problem, is that he has a following of young people who are buying into this EVIL! These lies!!!! There are facebook videos of women being raped and then killed that were live streamed to their families! How can you possibly say that it didn’t happen?!? You liar!! There is a special place in HELL reserved for you, Hasan, and contrary to possibly your belief, it’s going to burn for a VERY LONG TIME!!!!!
Okay…
That was several days ago.
Today is Friday and I have had a TRULY CRAPPY WEEK! I even pranged the car last night. I fully and 100% believe that the more and closer we walk with God, the more Satan steps in and gets in our way and fights with us and tries to make our life more difficult.
I have had such a fantastic spiritual couple of weeks with my ministries and with counseling people and mostly with my own personal walk. My FBI (Faith Bible Institute) Study has been FANTASTIC and I have learned so much and I feel like I have grown so much closer to God and to the Spirit, that it makes perfect sense for the adversary to be playing havoc in my life and he really has!
Work has been absolutely overwhelming with people wanting things from me.
Then, I ordered and had made some very special coins…military type challenge coins for those of you who know what those are … for Veterans Day for my church. Has the church’s logo and a special scripture about the Armor of God on one side and a “Thank you for your service” type of thing on the other side. Veterans Day is a hugely special thing for me. I wanted this in a really, really bad way. And maybe that was another problem. Maybe I didn’t want it in the right way, if you know what I mean. I had talked to Pastor about them and he had talked about the Men’s group and the Women’s group going in half & half on them and I thought that was a good idea. If you’ve never ordered these things they can be a little pricey.
Well, Pastor had a death in his family and then he got sick and we had another death in the church and, long story short, I wasn’t going to bother him about the money when time was running out, so I ordered them myself, paid the tax when the church could have ordered them tax-exempt I think (maybe not. I’m not sure how that works with just expenses or on anything) and put the cost (about $650) on my credit card. God will make it all work out.
Told the company, Signature Coins, five stars by the way!!!, that I had to have them by the first week of November and they actually got them to me like two weeks early!
And then FedEx lost my package! I freaked out. See, I had to have it delivered to a CVS because they needed a signature to accept delivery so I couldn’t have them delivered to the house because I couldn’t guarantee that someone would be home since Izzy and I both work. FedEx swore they were dropped off and CVS said they didn’t have it. We went round and round for 5 days! With me praying to God to keep the anger from me because I was REALLY getting mad!
The box has to be somewhere, right? So the Spirit whispers to me, maybe someone messed up the label. Maybe have CVS look for the tracking number and not your name. So, I went back to the store for like the third time and got the same person I had already dealt with and she, of course gives me attitude (quick prayer, please Lord, help me not get angry) I tell her my plan about the tracking number and can we please check? Should be a small, heavy little box.
“There’s no tracking numbers on these boxes.”
Yes there are, here, let me show you.
“YOU CAN’T COME BEHIND THE COUNTER.”
I’m not coming behind the counter, just let me …
“Oh, the tracking number is right here. So, what number are we looking for?”
So, I tell her and she finds it on the second box she looked at. The same box that I know for a FACT was sitting there the very first day that I went and asked about my box. The same box that through many inquiries and several drivers and multiple phone calls, no one could find because…here, I’ll show you.
Here’s the last three letters of my last name:
And here’s the tracking number:
And all because me, someone who’s not even IN the business thought to say, “Hey. Why don’t we look for the tracking number?” Thinking they may have fat-fingered the name on the shipping label or something. Or something was right. It was torn. Nobody could see that it was torn? Looks pretty obvious to me?
So, on the very same night that I got that worked out, on the way home from my FBI class, one of the older guys wanted to know if he could follow me home because his route was under construction. So, pulling out of the dark parking lot I pulled up and he wasn’t pulling out. I waited a couple of minutes and he still wasn’t coming. So I turned the wheel to spin back around to go back and there was a light pole in my blind spot and I pranged right into the concrete square holding it up. Right in my passenger side door.
Not horrible, but more than I can afford right now, especially with the coins taking up room on my credit card. I’m not really that worried about it, I just feel horrible about it. Oh, why did the older guy get hung up behind me? He did the exact same thing. He turned right into a light pole and REALLY dinged up his car.
The Spirit helped me fix up one problem, so Satan had to throw another one in front of me. Well, let me say something publically right now. You can listen up you old liar, it’s not going to make any difference AT ALL. My walk with God is only going to increase from here, because all you are proving to me with all your stupid nonsense is that I am on the right path. So, it’s not going to be me that gives up, or gets distracted, so YOU might as well.
And those were just a couple of the highlights my dear friends, so what do you say we get to the fun stuff and chase away the nonsense with some laughter, shall we?
That is way, WAY, WAY too much information for me!!! Having worked in the Department of Corrections in a couple of different formats, it never ceases to amaze me what people will do.
It bothers me that we are not making more of this in the news and such, than we are. We should be marching in there with every piece of law enforcement that we have and get these people their homes back!
Tren de Aragua Seizes 4 Apartment Buildings in San Antonio
The gang received national prominence after reports surfaced of armed members taking over an apartment complex in Aurora, Colorado. Former President Donald Trump and his running mate, Sen. JD Vance, R-Ohio, have used the gang’s increased presence as evidence the U.S. needs new leadership to secure the border.
The gang is known for drug smuggling, child prostitution, and human trafficking rings in South America. Many members have taken advantage of the porous U.S. southern border to boost their numbers and influence in America.
Local law enforcement confirmed to the outlet that members have been running their operations out of the Palatia Apartments in San Antonio for the past six months. The gang rented out vacant apartments to other migrants, ran prostitution rings of women and children, and conducted numerous drug deals, the sources said.
Three other apartment buildings were not named due to ongoing police investigations of the gang’s activities in the city.
Last week, police conducted a massive raid on the Palatia complex with one resident saying: “Every department was here. They were wearing helmets and body armor.” After searching over 300 apartments, police arrested 19 people, confirming four as gang members.
“One TdA member is a confirmed enforcer for that gang and 15 were in the country illegally,” said San Antonio Police Chief William McManus.
News of the gang’s presence in San Antonio comes a day after the owner of a group of apartment buildings in Aurora said the gang has been trying to extort the property owners and has taken over several of their properties in the city.
Can you imagine…American Gangs take over Apartment complexes in ____ (name your favorite foreign country). Take over empty apartments and run prostitution and drug operations. That other country would not only be all over US to do something about it, but would be going in with everything that their military had to offer to get them out! And what do we do? Our news media at the debate says, “Oh, it was only four buildings in Aurora and police are said to have things under control.” Do you hear yourself? Only four buildings… ONLY FOUR BUILDINGS!!!!! “Oh, don’t worry about little Billy. He only shot four other kids when he took daddy’s gun to school.” Are you even listening to yourself!!
I’ve wondered that so many times myself that I’ve decided that I no longer care if it’s not acceptable for me to point it out. I’m going to. We all know that common sense isn’t common, and stupidity runs rampant through our society and if Dragon Laffs needs to be the voice calling in the wilderness than so be it. We’ll just continue to do it with a smile.
I Just Lost 100,000,000 Brain Cells After Looking At These 23 Extremely Stupid Things People Actually Posted On The Internet Last Week
That has got to be one of the funnest things I’ve read all week!
I want to go there!!!!
This next one is SO COOL! It’s from our great buddy in South Africa, thanks Wouter!!!
Hope you enjoy this one- it’s interesting to see all that
Is included. It would prove invaluable assistance to anyone studying history or biographies.
Well worth saving for students.
Now take a look at this picture…..
Oil on canvas, 2006.
|
This painting is truly remarkable.
Even more amazing though, is that the canvas has
Been computerized. When you click on the link below, a much bigger
Version of the computerized painting appears. Run your cursor over the people.
The programme tells you who they are – every single
One of them. BUT (click on a person) and you obtain the individual’s life history.
This is fascinating… Can keep you busy for hours! CLICK HERE |
Yes, it really can keep you busy for hours…more than two and a half hours for me … this last time … lol. Thanks again Wouter for sending it our way.
32 Extremely Dumb Pictures That Make Me Laugh Uncontrollably Literally Every Single Time I Think Of Them
That is outstandingly sick humor! Two thumbs up! Okay, so maybe only one.
That is so cool! I would go there just so I could have my picture taken out front!!!
40 Random Bits of STEM Trivia You’d Never Be Able to Drum Up on Your Fancy Graphing Calculator
Think about the last couple of lines if you aren’t there yet…
Yeah…a different list completely.
This next one is from Lynn
World’s Largest Solar Power Plant That Covers 32,947 Acres
The plant is located in northwest Xinjiang, China is covers 32,947 acres of desert.
With a 3.5-gigawatt-capacity plant, it’s capable of powering a small country like Cameroon or Laos without help.
“By 2030 almost half of China’s electricity generation will come from renewable energy sources.”
The country’s wind and solar farms are the reason, even before this latest plant came online.
The Xinjiang region is a hub for renewable energy production, as its ample sun, wind, and low population make it an ideal spot.
Why?! Why would you do this? I hope the judge throws this out of court!
THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW IF YOU MOVE TO THE SOUTH.
- A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
- There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.
- There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one’s seen before.
- If it grows, it’ll stick ya. If it crawls, it’ll bite cha.
- Onced and Twiced are words.
- It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!
- Jawl-P? means: Did you all go to the bathroom?
- People actually grow, eat, and like okra.
- Fixinto is one word. It means I’m going to do something.
- There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there’s supper.
- Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you’re two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.
- Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.
- The word jeet is actually a question meaning, ‘Did you eat?’
- You don’t have to wear a watch, because it doesn’t matter what time it is, you work until you’re done or it’s too dark to see.
- You don’t PUSH buttons, you MASH em.
- Y’all is singular. All Y’all is plural.
- All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.
- You carry jumper cables in your car for your OWN car.
- You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Cajun seasoning, Tabasco, and ketchup.
- The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, motorsports, and gossip.
- Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss (first name), or Mr (first name)
- You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
- You know what a hissy fit is..
- Fried catfish is the other white meat.
- We don’t need no dang Driver’s Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!
This is one that Izzy and I found!
Beautiful!
Heroes of the Hurricane!
A shy gentleman was preparing to board a plane, when he heard that the Pope was on the same flight.
“This is exciting,” thought the gentleman. “I’ve always been a big fan of the Pope. Perhaps I’ll be able to see him in person.”
Imagine his surprise when the Pope sat down in the seat next to him for the flight. Still, the gentleman was too shy to speak to the Pontiff.
Shortly after take-off, the Pope began a crossword puzzle.
“This is fantastic,” thought the gentleman. “I’m really good at crosswords. Perhaps, if the Pope gets stuck, he’ll ask me for assistance.”
Almost immediately, the Pope turned to the gentleman and said, “Excuse me, but do you know a four letter word referring to a woman that ends in ‘unt’?”
Only one word leapt to mind… “My goodness,” thought the gentleman, “I can’t tell the Pope that. There must be another.” The gentleman thought for quite a while, then it hit him. Turning to the pope, the gentleman said, “I think you’re looking for the word ‘aunt’.”
“Of course,” said the Pope. “Do you have an eraser?”
Amen! You get what you deserve. Bird shot is a lot better than a regular bullet. Mess around and find out! Play stupid games and win stupid prizes. You wouldn’t be NEAR so lucky breaking into MY house!
This is the way Grandmas (and Grandpas) should be! If you don’t like it, well, it’s pretty self-explanatory in the letter. I LOVE this letter.
Thanksgiving Letter from Grandma!
Dear Family…….Living is still important to me.
If being in my Last Will and Testament is important to you, then you might consider being with me for my favorite holiday. Dinner is at 2:00. Not 2:15. Not 2:05. Two. 2:00! Arrive late and you get what’s left over.
Last year, that moron Marshall fried a turkey in one of those contraptions and practically burned the deck off the house. This year, the only peanut oil used to make the meal will be from the secret scoop of peanut butter I add to the carrot soup.
Jonathan, your last new wife was an idiot. You don’t arrive at someone’s house on Thanksgiving needing to use the oven and the stove. Honest to God, I thought you might have learned after two wives – date them longer and save us all the agony of another divorce.
Now, the house rules are slightly different This year because I have decided that 47% of you don’t know how to take care of nice things. Paper plates and red Solo cups might be bad for the environment, but I’ll be gone soon and that will be your problem to deal with.
House Rules:
- The University of Texas no longer plays Texas A&M. The television stays off during the meal.
- The “no cans for kids” rule still exists. We are using 2-liter bottles because your children still open a third can before finishing the first two. Parents can fill a child’s cup when it is empty. All of the cups have names on them and I’ll be paying close attention to refills.
- Chloe, last year we were at Trudy’s house and I looked the other way when your Jell-O salad showed up. This year, if Jell-O salad comes in the front door it will go right back out the back door with the garbage. Save yourself some time, honey. You’ve never been a good cook and you shouldn’t bring something that wiggles more than you. Buy something from the bakery.
- Grandmothers give grandchildren cookies and candy. That is a fact of life. Your children can eat healthily at your home. At my home, they can eat whatever they like as long as they finish it.
- I cook with bacon and bacon grease. That’s nothing new. Your being a vegetarian doesn’t change the fact that stuffing without bacon is like egg salad without eggs. Even the green bean casserole has a little bacon grease in it. That’s why it tastes so good. Not eating bacon is just not natural. And as far as being healthy… look at me. I’ve outlived almost everyone I know.
- Salad at Thanksgiving is a waste of space.
- I do not like cell phones. Leave them in the car.
- I do not like video cameras. There will be 32 people here. I am sure you can capture lots of memories without the camera pointed at me.
- Being a mother means you have to actually pay attention to the kids. I have nice things and I don’t put them away just because the company is coming over. Mary, watch your kids and I’ll watch my things.
- Rhonda, a cat that requires a shot twice a day is a cat that has lived too many lives. I think staying home to care for the cat is your way of letting me know that I have lived too many lives too. I can live with that. Can you?
- Words mean things. I say what I mean. Let me repeat: You don’t need to bring anything means you don’t need to bring anything. And if I did tell you to bring something, bring it in the quantity I said. Really, this doesn’t have to be difficult.
- Domino’s and cards are better than anything that requires a battery or an on/off switch. That was true when you were kids and it’s true now that you have kids.
- Showing up for Thanksgiving guarantees presents at Christmas. Not showing up guarantees a card that may or may not be signed.
Love You, Grandma
One of my favorite snacks has just taken on a whole new meaning.
Bob left work one Friday evening. (Why does it always have to be Bob?)
But it was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with his mates and spending his entire wages.
When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.
Finally his wife stopped the nagging and said to him, “How would you like it if you didn’t see me for two or three days?”
He replied, “That would be fine with me.”
Monday went by and he didn’t see his wife.
Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.
But on Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
She’s got a plan…
A biker stopped by the local Harley Shop to have his bike repaired. They couldn’t do the work while he waited, and so, since he didn’t live far from the shop, he decided to walk home.
On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. He stopped at the feed store / livestock dealer and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, he had a problem… How to carry his entire purchases home.
The feed store owner said,
“Why don’t you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?” “Hey, thanks!” said the biker, and out the door he went.
In the parking lot he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost, and asked if he could tell her the way to 1603 Mockingbird Lane.
The biker said,
“As a matter of fact, I live at 1616 Mockingbird Lane. We can take a short cut down this alley and be there in no time”.
The little old lady looked him over cautiously, and then said,
“I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won’t hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and ravish me?”
The biker said,
“Holy smokes lady! I’m carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in Hell could I possibly hold you up against a wall and do that?”
The lady said,
“Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I’ll hold the chickens.”
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.
I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked,”If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?”
“No, I had to stop drinking years ago,” the homeless man replied.
“Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?” I asked.
“No, I don’t waste time fishing,” the homeless man said..”I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend this on hunting equipment?” I asked.
“Are you NUTS!” replied the homeless man. “I haven’t gone hunting in 20 years!”
“Well,” I said, “I’m not going to give you money. Instead, I’m going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.”
The homeless man was astounded. “Won’t your wife be furious with you for doing that?
I replied, “Don’t worry about that. It’s important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting.
This one is so Good! Thanks to Pop Smith for sending it along:
This is probably the best answer l’ve ever heard to the question, “Why did God create evil?”
READ THIS…
A professor at the university asked his students the following question, “Everything that exists was created by God?”
The student’s name was Albert Einstein.
No…it wasn’t Albert Einstein, who became very disillusioned with God and religion in youth and stayed that way for most of his life from what I could find out. Although, as an interesting side note, one of the teachers that I had in middle school (?) or junior high (?) I forget which, claimed to have been a nun in an earlier life and that when she was young, it was her job to walk Albert home from school because he would get lost on the way home. Just as an interesting gee whiz. But, back to the main point, whoever said it, it is a GREAT analogy!
The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
And that, my friends is that. Until we meet again. I hope you enjoyed this little bit longer version.
Dragon Laffs 
you sir are amazing, this is the best issue yet. going out to collect pop bottles to return for deposit and send it to you in appreciation Mark Mcdade
Thank you Mark