So it’s now Saturday morning and I am in a rush to get this done for Monday, so I can get started for Thursday because, like I’ve mentioned several times before, I am busy Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.  And…AND…if you guys were paying attention to today’s (Saturday’s) episode, I have a letter to share with you that I REALLY want your opinion on, that you will find in the Political section.  

The first thing I did this morning was check on the comments.  Well, okay, that’s technically a lie, so let’s be honest.  The first thing I did this morning was play Wordle and Connections on the NYT website.  Something I do every day.  Something I highly recommend to ALL of you.  You want to keep Alzheimer and Dementia away?  Here is the greatest thing you can do.  I’ll give you the secret.  Go get a paper and pencil and write this down.  It’s important.  Go on, I’ll wait.

KEEP YOUR MIND ACTIVE AND ENGAGED WITH REAL STUFF!!!  Not mindless television.  Not stupid stuff.  REAL things that make you THINK!  Do crossword puzzles.  Do math puzzles.  READ!

READ!!

I’m serious here.  Every day I do the Wordle, the Connections, a Killer Sudoku, I was doing the NYT crossword until they started charging me for it (I think I had a trial to it or something, but it made me made when they wanted to charge me money to do a darn crossword puzzle and I stopped and none of the other ones were really hard enough) and of  course I READ!!  I’m normally in the middle of a few books at once.

So, back to where we were.  The first thing I did was what I just said, then I got gas and mowed the lawn, THEN I checked for comments and didn’t find any when I was sure I would find something from someone.  So I jumped right in and that’s where we are…

Okay, so that was a long way to go to get to say…

Stephen B. sent me this very special picture…I want you guys to try and figure it out…

It is a dog.  The bottom which you think is a mouth is an ear and the dog is facing up to the ceiling.

Dude, that is wrong on so many, many different levels.

Okay, so that was beautiful.

Two friends, one very wealthy and the other quite poor, were sitting in a bar late one night. 

They were talking about different things when the poor man asked the rich man, 

“So what did you end up giving your wife for her birthday, the Mercedes or the diamond ring?” 

“I got her the Mercedes and the diamond ring,” says the rich man.

The poor man, a bit puzzled, asked, “Why the heck did you get her both?” 

The rich man replied, “I got her both so if she doesn’t like the ring, she can drive her new car back to the jeweler’s to exchange it.  So… What did YOU buy for YOUR wife?” 

The poor man says, “I bought her a pair of flip-flops and a dildo.” 

Obviously confused, the rich man asked why he chose those items.

The poor man replied,

“Because if she doesn’t like the flip-flops, she can go screw herself!” 

Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today.  It is already tomorrow in Australia.

– Charles Schulz (1922-2000)

I had no idea this was so much of a thing.  I really kind of thought it was just a Jersey thing.  Raising little Jersey Thugs.  Turns out, it’s all across the country…maybe the whole world!  Just a fast Google search turned up SO MUCH!  Here’s just a quick sample…

And this one I love!

Okay, so that’s the end of the little Red Rover docudrama.

LOL!  Okay, that’s the perfect sign to come next!  LOL!

Impish Dragon for King!  Okay, okay.  So…maybe not King.  How about for President?

Hey!  Me too!

No…sadly, it’s Monday.  About as far from Friday as you can  possibly get.

Okay, I’m going to tell you RIGHT NOW that this next one is from Joe.  Joe sent this in.  Joe from NJ.  Just so you know.  Not sayin’ anything else, just letting you know that JOE SENT THIS NEXT ONE IN.

(I ain’t gettin’ blamed for this one…)

How do you make an orange laugh?

 

Tickle its navel

(Sorry brother, I shouldn’t have thrown you under the bus like that, but … damn!)

Wait!  Wait!  This one is so much better!!!

Ha, Ha, Ha!!! In your 30s!!!

My daughter called me at work to say I was to phone Ian at my bank.

The operator asked me what Ian’s last name was and I explained that he hadn’t left his surname.

When she asked for his department, I said I didn’t know.

“There are 1500 employees in this building, ma’am,” she advised me rather curtly.

After a few more brusque comments, I asked her for her name. “Danielle,” she said. “And your last name?” I asked.

“Sorry,” she replied, “we don’t give out last names.”

Okay, so actually out of all the silly assed Star Trek memes, that one was pretty good.

And there we are back again.

Poor Bob.  Ever notice, the poor schmucks name is always Bob…

Real mothers don’t eat quiche; they don’t have time to make it. 

Real mothers know that their kitchen utensils are probably in the sandbox. 

Real mothers often have sticky floors, filthy ovens, and happy kids. 

Real mothers know that dried playdough doesn’t come out of shag carpet. 

Real mothers don’t want to know what the vacuum just sucked up. 

Real mothers sometimes ask “why me?” and get their answer when a little voice says, “because I love you best.” 

Real mothers know that a child’s growth is not measured by height or years or grade… it is marked by the progression of Mama to Mommy to Mom… 

“Sweetheart, the kids are at home, we need to go pick up the pizza and get back before they realize we’re gone.  So hurry it up.”

Our local minister had all of his remaining teeth pulled and new dentures made a few weeks ago.

The first Sunday, his sermon lasted 10 minutes.

The second Sunday, he preached only 20 minutes.

But, on the third Sunday he preached for an hour and a half.

I asked him about this.

He then told me “Well, that first Sunday, my gums were so sore it hurt to talk.

The second Sunday, my dentures were still hurting a lot.

But the third Sunday, I accidentally grabbed my wife’s dentures and I couldn’t stop talking!”

PHRASES FOR YOU TO USE IN AN INTERVIEW

Phrase: I’m extremely adept at all manners of office organization.
Meaning: I’ve used Microsoft Office.

Phrase: I’m honest, hard-working and dependable.
Meaning: I pilfer office supplies.

Phrase: I take pride in my work.
Meaning: I blame others for any mistakes.

Phrase: I’m personable.
Meaning: I give lots of unsolicited personal advice to co-workers.

Phrase: I am very adaptable.
Meaning: I’ve changed jobs a lot.

Phrase: I am on the go.
Meaning: I’m never at my desk.

Phrase: I’m highly motivated to succeed.
Meaning: The minute I find a better job, I’m outta here.

7-Up’s original name was “Bib-Label Lithiated Lemon-Lime Soda.”

That’s pretty much my theory on the whole thing.  AND…with the crappy and dangerous stuff that I work with on a regular basis that haven’t killed me yet, I figure I’m pretty much immune to the normal bugs and flu stuff that floats around that the rest of ya’ll get.

I’ve known feral housewives…fun times!

I wonder if Mexicans ever say, “Let’s go to the White People’s Restaurant”?

When you’re okay with naked strangers dancing for children, but go apocalyptic when adults pray to God — You’re on the side of evil and we’re done pretending any different.

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version…it doesn’t listen to anything.

I wasn’t sure about this one at first, so I looked it up to be sure…and I was right in my assumption and now exact in my knowledge.  I figured the Jewish calendar was higher than the one we normally use and it is.  It is either the year 5783 or 5784 in the Jewish calendar.  That’s a lot more calories than 2023.

That is so sad.

This next one is another great, short essay from Friggin’ Pete.  I enjoy his writing.  And this one will not disappoint.

If you leave the gate open, the cow will wander off. 
So, if you intentionally leave the gate open, you want the cow to wander off.  You can’t blame stupidity or laziness. It was intentional.

If you cut police budgets, you will get more crime on the streets.  

If you cut back the supply of oil, gas prices will go up. 

If you print trillions of dollars without increasing the supply of goods, inflation will hit hard.

If you leave the southern border wide open, you get more drug trafficking and human trafficking.  

If you shut down 40% of the supply of baby formula in February, you’ll get a huge shortage. 
When you KNOW a huge baby formula shortage is coming because of the FDAs actions, and you purposefully do nothing to prevent it, month after month, until the crisis finally hits hard, you INTENDED this crisis.

It is time to recognize the evil people behind that old man. 
They want crisis. They want chaos. They want riots. They want conflicts in your town. 

You can feel the quality of your life going down with the country.

These are not foolish or incompetent people who don’t know what they are doing, these are people who have purposely opened every gate on the farm because…..they want YOUR cows!!

Very well said my friend.  And we try very hard to try and convince you to keep a close eye on your cows, and point out where the evil people are.  And the next letter (the one I told you about) I found out isn’t really a letter.  It was sent to me as a letter, but is really an article from a website called ACT For Canada.  And it dovetails quite nicely with Pete’s essay above, although MUCH darker and MUCH deeper.  But, we’ll get to that in a moment.  Let’s do a couple more of these first…

Okay, since it is an article, I’m going to give you the link https://www.actforcanada.ca/l/return-of-the-knights-templar-usa/ to said article so you can go and check it out for yourself.  I’m going to leave it up here in it’s entirety  and put some comments of my own in blue.  Again, I’d really like to know your opinion.

Return of the Knights Templar USA

By: Theodore Wilson

September, 14, 2023 

Throughout the years, tales about the Knights Templar have provoked intrigue and fascination about this medieval order. Some people believe that when King Philip of France resolved to destroy them, the Knights Templar went underground and still exists today.

Indeed, such a body has risen to power this millennium and presents the same stature and power of dominant control over the world. The factual origin of the Knights Templar, their financial impact and wealth, and the institutions they founded mirror the present World Economic Forum.

After the First Crusade (1096-99), Hugues de Payens, a knight, and Bernard of Clairvaux, an abbot, both from Troyes, France, created a religious military order called the Poor Fellow-Soldiers of Christ and the Temple of Solomon (1118), better known as the Knights Templar. Under the Papal Bull issued by Pope Innocent II, they were exempt from taxes, could own their oratories, and were subject only to the Pope.

The Knights Templar, known as brave and fearlessly skilled warriors, selfishly took advantage of their independence from royalty and used their position to accumulate an immense amount of wealth. Templars created the banking system and became the primary lending institution of Europe for monarchs, nobles, and bourgeoisie merchants

Their sphere of business consisted of the largest depository of money in the world and a vast network of property, and they ran the accountancy and auditing processes of the French government. The vastness of their wealth equated to power, and they were in control over the world.

By the beginning of the Fourteenth Century, the economic plight of the monarchy and nobles who were heavily in debt made them realize that they were being held servants to the Knights Templar. (Like the rest of us being held captive to the ones who hold the wealth)

King Philip IV of France resolved to re-establish the sovereignty of the monarchies, and arrested the Templars in Paris, including Jacques de Molay (1307). Gradually, over seven years, the Knights Templars were arrested all over Europe. Many were tortured, executed, or signed confessions of corruption and were banished. King Philip and King Edward II of England seized most of their wealth.

Today, elite billionaires have formed a society modeled after the Knight Templars of the past, and they call themselves the World Economic Forum. They meet secretly in Dabos, Switzerland under the platform of global warming.  (I don’t understand the global warming.  Anybody with an ounce of brains in their head knows what a farce that is, but yet so many people are charging forward with the STUPID electric vehicles, no gas stoves or appliances and the latest nonsense to redesign ceiling fans?  Are you kidding me?  Are you people actually that moronic?  Global warming IS NOT SCIENCE!  It’s control.)

The WEF has carefully orchestrated events, and the accomplishments of these modern Templars have become a shock of reality, they are taking control of the world.

The power structure of the World Economic Forum billionaires hinges on the swift hand of the bankers and financial institutions in the United States, including Black Rock and Morgan Stanley Capital International’s (MSCI), who formed what has become known as the ESG, an abbreviation for environmental, social, and corporate governance.

The power of the ESG clutches the entire world under the auspices of the United Nations and implements the environmental and socioeconomic policies that are dictated by the World Economic Forum and ESG. They control governments, corporations, and educational institutions to socially engineer the racial antagonism of the Woke movement, and LGNNTQ+, among others.  (It’s all evil.)

Evidence indicates that the wealth of Black Rock Inc. exceeds 30 percent of the world’s money, and assets up to about 55 trillion dollars. The wealth of the Templars behind this corporation has become greater and more powerful than almost every country in the world.  (If I remember correctly, the United States is 30 Trillion dollars in debt and these guys control about a third of the wealth in the world at 55 trillion…so that means that our debt equals about what?  20% of the world’s wealth?!?!)

That they have cornered the world economic markets, and taken control of national and local governments, exemplifies the power and capabilities of the Knight Templars, and soars beyond the imagination of average citizens. They are real and evil, following the path of fascism that leads to the doorstep of China and the Communist Party.

The ESG has launched a war against the American People in the dark shadows much like the Ho Chi Minh Trail that burrowed underground in Vietnam. You can’t see them and don’t realize that they exist, but they are there, working diligently to overthrow the United States government.

Hidden from conscious reflection are citizens who have experienced the repercussions of the woke movement. They have witnessed how the learning environment in schools has been kidnapped by the liberals in the Blue States. The hard-handed might of the ESG policies has unveiled the revelation that parents no longer have rights over their children in public schools.  (Yeah!  Read this article to scare the heck out of you! https://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2023/09/cps_sicced_on_a_dad_after_his_daughter_came_home_from_school_with_antidepressants_.html)

Why? They are shrewd and well indoctrinated in the principles unveiled in Das Kapital, Karl Marx’s seminal work that describes “how it is to be done.” To achieve their goal, they begin by alienating and radicalizing the American youth against traditional family values, and good character, and then the destruction of a nation’s culture.

Fascism relies on public opinion to accomplish its goals. Initially, they ignite a fire by creating demonstrations and riots, like those we witnessed before Biden was elected in 2020. Their platform goes against the grain, people reject it, but they must be convinced to submit to the takeover by new principles of life as apostles of human compassion to destroy the old society.  (You didn’t think that all those BLM riots were accidents, did you?  Why no one was ever really prosecuted?  All the MSM said that it was just mild protesting?)

How can they do this? Simply by creating self-guilt and contempt for the system. Re-write history, and paint a horrible picture of society and the plight of the economic poor. By placing the guilt of the past on the shoulders of the present, people panic. Hence, we end up with the politically correct.

The population, in general, doesn’t immediately buy into this plot. People must be broken down mentally, programmed, and engineered socially. This carefully orchestrated platform has been implemented. It appears in every community and home in the nation that has televisions, computers, and a public school district. Conflicting views must be eliminated, and contrary speech and views must be out of sight and sound.

Censorship destroys dialog contrary to their platform. Large corporations are graded and then punished if they don’t meet the standards established by the ESG. The disturbing reality can be seen in Black Rock Inc., a United States company that implements Michael Bloomberg’s ESG platform through the hard hand of CEO Larry Fink.

Examples of how the Templars use their wealth for power are plentiful. George Soros donated hundreds of millions of dollars in major election races across the United States. Soros, for example, financed the riots in the summer of 2020 and invested over 100 million in municipal district attorney races in Blue States across the country if they pledged to support the ESG policies.

Mark Zuckerburg donated six million to officials in Fulton County, Georgia in 2020 to increase the number of Biden voters. Donations by Bill Gates to liberal candidates amounted to hundreds of millions of dollars dedicated to closing coal mines, reducing farming, eliminating gasoline engines, increasing abortions, and strengthening the LGBTIOA movement.

Black Rock (ESG) needed ultimate power. They financed a mentally disabled old politician who desperately wanted to be president. They now control the White House and masquerade as the Biden Administration. These Templars have orchestrated the liberal political agenda. With the aid of the FBI and the Justice Department, the Democrats have attacked Conservative politicians, often using excessive force to set an example to any conservative who resists the Biden Administration.

The television networks are owned by these billionaires, and they propagate the ESG agenda into the minds of disconnected citizens who no longer question or seek the facts. Both liberals and conservatives have been sucked into the World Economic Forum’s platform through the bombardment of algorisms and affirmations every time they turn on their computers and televisions for a daily dose of brainwashing.

Herein lies the reason for the Knights Templars’ need to employ censorship. They cannot win by revealing all the facts and must avoid all consequential discussions about issues to prevent people from awareness of the secrets in the dark shadows. The ESG confines information to affirmations about their political platform and omits the very truths that lead to an essential conversation.

The Knights Templar under the genius of master billionaires, including George Soros, Larry Fink, Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, and Mike Bloomberg, are building a one-world government whose economics will be controlled by a single corporation under their control. Humanity will form a perfectly homogeneous society under their design.

Contradictory echoes continue to surface daily in the form of new testimony about the past 3 years. George Soros spent millions of dollars planning and carrying out the riots in the United States in the summer of 2020 before the national elections.

When a large number of witnesses to election irregularities and distortion of results spoke out, many Americans were outraged. They spoke out loudly about what they saw and demanded answers. Donald Trump didn’t convince Americans to drop everything and go to Washington. They went there on their own cognizance in opposition to what they believed was a rigged election. The FBI, loyal to Obama and the World Economic Forum movement, and Washington D.C. authorities, seized the moment to destroy conservative unification. 

The Democrats surrounded the capital with a wire fence to symbolize that all Trump voters were rebels. They suspended the Constitutions to arrest and punish an exaggerated number of participants to justify the deaths of several demonstrators who lost their lives at the local authorities. A committee in Chicago was created to finance called “Stop Republicans,” and it served as a pipeline for the billionaires to funnel money for the future destruction of Trump and his supporters.

The COVID-19 epidemic itself falls off the scale of belief of Americans just as the assassination of John F. Kennedy. The uncertainties keep us scratching our heads. Important facts help paint a picture.  The virus was man-made with tax dollars from the United States.  Members of the World Economic Forum profited immensely. Dr. Anthony Fauci, who held part ownership rights to the production of the vaccine, participated in the project to create the virus.  (No kidding)

Again, censorship played a main role. If you chose not to be vaccinated, you were labeled as the cause of the virus’ spread. Ivermectin and hydroxychloroquine were taken off the market, not because they weren’t approved for medical use for humans, they had been approved. The Templars proved they could control the world.

Fauci didn’t want people to know it was ineffective. As a result, the vaccine caused countless deaths and today people are still falling victim to serious medical complications because they were vaccinated.

The cards are face up on the table. The Knights Templar of the 21^st. Century exists.  They are evil. The number of conservative politicians, scientists, and personnel in the medical field whose lives and careers have been intentionally destroyed by the ESG during the epidemic are dwarfed by the casualties of COVID-19, and they provide testimony to ESG power.

The success of the ESG provides the perfect leverage for the World Economic Forum to take permanent control of everyone in the United States. Trump’s imprisonment will be an object lesson to all conservative individuals who surface as a leader who attempts to unite all conservatives in a movement against the Knights Templar. The Justice Department has become a weapon that can be used against all conservative Americans who choose to resist the Democratic Party’s platform.  (Which again is why I ask you guys, who do we have out there who can stand up on the Conservative side?)

John Eastman, one of Trump’s attorneys was asked by authorities in Atlanta, Georgia if he believed the election of 2020 was stolen. “Absolutely,” Eastman answered, “I still believe that it was stolen.” Eastman was arraigned, arrested, and taken to jail.  Anticipate the comic punchline of what it would be like if every American who believed that the election of 2020 was highjacked surrendered to the District Attorneys in the Blue States who are prosecuting Republicans. The courts will be stacked up for years while Americans wait for trial to stand up for their belief in freedom of expression.

To many, the contents of this article will appear “far out,” too difficult to believe or wrap around the mind. Readers who recognize that it makes sense, most likely will become fearful and ask themselves, “What can I do?” If the WEF and ESG are to be stopped, ask questions, get informed, and get involved in the election of a new president and congress in 2024.  (Can we?  Can we get an honest election in 2024?)

The meek remain compliant and they accept whatever pseudo-authoritative information fed to them by the ESG’s bull media. Questions or civil disobedience are not their forte. The silence of these citizens increases the credibility of the World Economic Forum and aids in strengthening the Knights Templars of the Twelfth Century. 

However, the World Economic Forum can be derailed. The longer traditional Americans wait, the less likely that the Knights Templar will be stopped.  Democrat, Republican, and independent leaders must unite. They must work together in Congress to break up corporate monopolies as they did during the Populist movement at the end of the Nineteenth Century, and they must restore equal opportunity in the capitalist economy.

Those who witnessed the first Republican debate for the 2024 election were thrilled at the number of candidates who are ready to battle the World Economic Forum. Only one will win the nomination, and in the end, the other candidates must support the leader if we are going to stop fascism.  A united conservative front will provide an infirming indication that Americans will not stand idle if they watch the ballot boxes being stuffed and are then accused of being liars.

The Republican Party needs to create its own political issue committee as the Democrats did in 2020, not ugly and hateful, but to educate uninformed conservatives about the platform of the World Economic Forum and the ESG. There needs to be a mechanism in place to label and evaluate all corporations controlled by the Knights Templar. These companies should be listed, and available to the public, and as Americans, we can work together to fight the advancement of fascism and the prejudice of the woke movement.

I don’t know…after reading all that and going over it, my head hurts.  What do you guys think?  Truly, I want to know.  I know that’s a bit heavier than the stuff we normally talk about here at Dragon Laffs, and we’ll get back to the fun stuff, I promise.  But just for a couple of minutes, let’s be grown ups.  Write back to me at impishdragon@dragonlaffs.com or impishdragon@gmail.com and let me know what you think.

 

Yeah, which one makes more sense to you?

Alright, I’ve had enough, back to the laughter…

I always get confused with the differences between elves, fairies, sprites, pixies, etc.  I guess I just don’t understand the gnomenclature.  

I was happily watching the Bermuda Philharmonic Orchestra when the guy on triangle disappeared. 

What do you call someone who immigrated to Sweden?

Artificial Swedener

That’s actually a pretty valid hypothesis.  

Fact Of The Day:

The World’s First Animated Film

in 1917, Argentina released the world’s first animated feature film.  “El Apostol,” a political satire had a running time of 70 minutes.  According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the film was made up of 58,000 drawings.

Fact Of The Day:

Trained By The CIA

During the filming of The Grinch (released in 2000), Jim Carrey was trained by the CIA.  While making this movie, Carrey was put through “torture-endurance training” to help him go through the make-up process, which could take up to 8 hours to complete.  [Side Note:  Carrey also credited the soothing sounds of The Bee Gees as a big help during this make-up ordeal.]

Sometimes I stare at my husband when he isn’t looking and I think to myself…
Wow… He is one lucky son of a gun.

I choked on a carrot this afternoon and all I could think of was, “I bet a donut wouldn’t have done this to me.”

EGO

is just a small three letter word, which can destroy a big twelve letter word called

RELATIONSHIP.

Wife:  I’m terribly sick.  Could you please call the vet? 

Husband:  Uhm, shouldn’t I be calling the doctor instead? 

Wife:  Listen…I work like a horse, live like a dog, share a house with a gang of monkeys, and sleep with an old pig.  So please call the vet…

And that, my dear friends and fellow campers, brings us to the end of another adventure.  I certainly hope you enjoyed this issue.  And I hope I get a chance to entertain you again.  May our dear gracious Father in Heaven Bless you with Love and Happiness until we meet again.